Kuqi: Leaving Kosovo was the hardest time in my life
© Getty Images
For many children, football is a part of their lives that gives them the opportunity to spend time with friends and challenge themselves. Some, however, find it takes on a much greater importance.
As Shefki Kuqi grew up, playing the game became a crucial outlet in an alien environment as he overcame upheaval and uncertainty over a thousand miles from home. Aged just 12, the former Finlandinternational and English Premier League striker fled the impending war in Yugoslavia, being whisked away to Scandinavia as tensions simmered in his Balkan homeland.
“At that age you don't think about politics, what's going on outside,” Kuqi told FIFA.com. “Your first reaction is, 'Where are we going? Are we ever going to see our friends and cousins again? We're going there and we don't know anybody.' It was the hardest time in my life.”
Growing up in the small town of Vucitrn, nestled among the hills of northern Kosovo, reports of attacks on ethnic Albanians began to surface, while his eldest brother faced military service. It was decided that Shefki and his close family would follow their uncle to Finland.
So, on a snow-wrapped winter's day in 1989, he, his siblings and mother all left their home in Kosovo for the final time – a moment still etched in Shefki's memory. A nervous journey to Gdansk, Poland, via Belgrade, followed. “We had to be quiet on the train so no one would hear us talking. We were scared someone would grab us and send us back home. There was a lot happening.
“I was overcome by the feeling of when someone throws you into the water,” he said, describing the moment their ferry left for Finland. “We had no idea where we were going and we didn't know what was going to happen.”
Looking back, the coach of Finnish second division side PK-35 Vantaa appreciates the sacrifice his family took. “I have to give real thanks to my parents – they decided to give everything up for us, to look after their kids and make sure they had the best possible options in life. I have two and I would do anything for them.”
Kuqi can empathise with the plight of today's masses of refugees, but also finds their ordeal beyond even his own comprehension. “I don't think there are words that can explain [the choices being made],” he said. “Of course you don't want anybody to go through things like that. You're moving, you're leaving everything behind.
“People today just want to have a normal life, but – especially when you have kids – you can come to a position where you have no option. They still have no idea where you are going to end up. If you have an idea of where you are going, you know you'll get there some day.”
Adapting to a new life
While the Kuqis had their destination set, they were still stepping into the unknown. A new culture, language and climate all met them on the Finnish shore. “We were some of the first foreigners to come over here. Just by looking, people knew you weren't Finnish,” the former Newcastle United forward reflected. “When you have no friends and you don't speak the language, it's pretty hard.”
On the brink of his teenage years, Kuqi had to face those challenges in school, but football proved a way to break down the barriers. “When you are a foreigner, one of the great ways to get an insight into people is football. For me it was a massive, massive help. Football is just one language – you understand each other.”
Having spent many of his formative years in Finland, so much so as to feel “half Finnish”, he jumped at the chance to pull on the national shirt once his playing career began. “I have huge respect for Finlandand the opportunities they gave me,” Kuqi said. “I'm really proud and honoured to have represented them so many times.”
The first of his 62 caps came in an “unbelievable game” with Belgium in 1999 which ended 4-4, but a 2-0 FIFA World Cup™ qualifying win – and goal – against Albania three years later holds particularly cherished memories. “I remember that goal well,” he laughs. “To go and play against your nation was a special feeling for me.”
After working through his struggles, which he credits with providing his mental strength, he has blazed a trail which his brothers Njazi, a fellow Finnish international, and Albert, whom he coaches at PK-35, have followed. “I was the first ever player to represent Finland who had not been born there,” Shefki said. “Now we have loads in the same situation.
“I feel great to have been able to open that door, not only for my brothers but for plenty of players inFinland. I think it was much easier for Njazi and Albert. [Race and nationality] doesn't matter any more like it did before. You go through all those things, but now I feel proud."